So, you’re getting married—congrats! Now comes the fun (and sometimes overwhelming) part of planning your big day. One big decision? Who’s going to officiate the ceremony? While you could go with a professional officiant, about half of my couples ask a friend or family member to take the reins. If you’re thinking about going this route, let’s talk about the perks and the must-haves to make sure your ceremony goes off without a hitch (except for the one you’re there for).
The Perks of Choosing a Friend as Your Officiant
1. A Meaningful Connection
Having a friend stand up there with you isn’t just a sweet idea—it’s a deeply personal touch. Instead of some stranger reading off a script, you’ll have someone who actually knows your story. The way they talk about your love, the inside jokes they drop, the heartfelt way they look at you—it all adds up to a ceremony that feels uniquely you.
2. A Familiar Face for Your Guests
A professional officiant might do a great job, but let’s be honest—most of your guests won’t know them. When you pick a friend, you give your guests someone they probably already recognize. That familiarity helps everyone feel more connected and engaged rather than feeling like they’re sitting through another cookie-cutter ceremony.
3. Shared Memories and Experiences
Picking a friend to officiate isn’t just about the ceremony—it’s about the journey leading up to it. You’ll get to plan together, brainstorm the script, maybe even rehearse (highly recommended!). It’s an experience that strengthens your bond and adds another incredible memory to your friendship. Plus, how cool is it to look back and say, “Yeah, my best friend married us”?
What to Consider Before Handing Over the Mic
1. Public Speaking Confidence
I cannot stress this enough: Your officiant has to be comfortable speaking in front of a crowd. It’s not just about knowing what to say—it’s about saying it in a clear, engaging, and confident way. If your friend becomes nervous when they have to speak to more than three people, it might be best to let them stick to a toast at the reception instead.
2. Taking the Role Seriously
Your wedding ceremony isn’t just a quick speech—it’s a huge moment. Your officiant needs to put in the effort to prepare. This isn’t the time for winging it! I once had a wedding where the officiant (a couple's friend) asked the wedding planner an hour before the ceremony if someone could write his script. Yeah, no. Don’t let that happen to you. Make sure your friend understands the responsibility and is committed to delivering a meaningful and smooth ceremony.
3. Loud and Clear
Your guests need to hear what’s happening, and so do I (the DJ) if I’m handling the mic. If your officiant speaks in a whisper or mumbles, that will be a problem. A soft-spoken officiant might mean half your guests have no idea when to cheer, and you don’t want your vows drowned out by the sound of seagulls or rustling palm trees (shoutout to all my beach wedding couples!). If they’re quieter, make sure they practice projecting their voice—or at least that they’re comfortable using a mic properly.
Final Thoughts
Choosing a friend to officiate your wedding is a terrific way to make your ceremony feel more personal and memorable. Just make sure they’re up for the job—meaning they can speak confidently, take the role seriously, and make themselves heard. Trust me, I’ve DJ’d hundreds of ceremonies and officiated eleven myself. Take it from me: the right officiant makes all the difference.
If you’ve already chosen a friend or family member to officiate, do them a favor and share this post with them! (Seriously, they’ll thank you later.)
Cheers to an unforgettable wedding ceremony!